Released
Thomas Dolby's song "My Brain Is Like a Sieve" has been on my mind constantly. I love the song and it's voice so I've included it ( in italics with some changed verbaige) in my poem that's helping me deal a bit better right now.Hell has no greater fury or rage
than a jilted Scorpio that only lives to love
When you said you loved me
When you showed me you could care
When you promised to be a part of me
You promised you would always be there
Did you really mean to kill me?
Were you ever really pleased
Sometimes I hate you more than I’ve ever hated anyone
I hate you for killing my memories
I know revenge is sweet for I’ve tasted it a million times
But it’s that bitter aftertaste that makes it not to be enjoyed
It’s hard to believe that these past 5 years
Is something you’ve been meaning to destroy
You allowed me Europe
You allowed me Brasil
You rented me all this empty space
That my heart now has to fill.
You gave me all the unimportant crap I could ever want
I gave you everything you never needed
You gave me coldness, degradation, and chastising
When I tried to save us and cried and pleaded.
I looked away from your cheating and your computer’s “favourite’s” list
And your other playpen’s of enjoyment that weren't mine
I looked away from the lies and insults
I looked away but saw it all the time.
I gave you a garden of roses
I gave you little gifts and toys
I sacrificed unto you my soul and life and poetry
Only to be discarded and replaced with your selfishness and young dumb boys
I made you homemade pasta every weekend
I was the only one to clean the floors and bathrooms on my hands and knees
And it wasn’t a big deal ‘cos I was in love with you
But now I see I was a fool who just wanted to believe
And could I orgasm in the revenge I could take upon you?
Of course, I could, oh what sweet memories through my revenge have sang
But time and your loneliness will be the ones to kill you, not me this time
Bad penny return from whence you came.
You ought to be ashamed of your behaviour
In treating me this way
As if I have deserved
To be some ditch
In which
to vomit your ire
Someday someone’s gonna dowse your bonfire
You’d make a crucial team in your dying world
And apology is a word
I’ve never ever heard
In your vocabulary
I’m a victim in your murder mystery
When you said you loved me
When you showed me you could care
When you promised to be a part of me
You promised you would always be there
Did you really mean to kill me?
Could you ever unconditionally please
It’s too hard to remember
For you’ve killed all the good memories
posted by Saint Vincent @ 12:13 PM
2 Comments:
Man...know that I am having positive thoughts for you - sorry for what you have endured
thank you anonymous... that was so wonderful of you to post... I'm much MUCH better now.. :D
"experience is what you get when you don't get what you want"
:)
thanks again,
cenzo
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